2:20 PM: Using pen to scrape nasty substance off of work desk.

3:00 PM – 4:15 PM: Chew on pen throughout dry conference-call.

4:16 PM: Realize pen in mouth is same pen used to scrape said nasty substance – gag.

4:16:01 PM: Insert Listerine Pocket Pak in mouth whilst hoping I didn’t swallow in the past hour and a half.

4:16:05 PM: Bolt to break room to get a Mountain Dew.

4:19 PM: Pretend I’m tougher than germs and try not to think about what the hell I just ate.

4:20 PM: Heh.